Thursday, September 20, 2012

Invid's Guide to the Star Wars Universe: Alien Species (#59)

581. Kodaians. Kodaians apparently are skittish, and those that still live on their homeworld several centuries after a disaster there (most apparently fled) think that "strangers" cause disasters. Even though the disaster that freaked them out so much was a flood, they comb their world's beaches every ten years looking for treasure. Or something.

Rating: 2/5. ...Honestly, these sound as much or more like traits you'd give a culture in a medieval fantasy setting, not an alien species.

582. Kon'me. The Kon'me are a race that apparently were long distrustful of outsiders and avoided involvement in outside affairs. When cortosis, a rare material useful for combating lightsabers, was discovered to be rather plentiful there during the Clone Wars, the Confederacy showed up and demanded access. The Kon'me leaders acceded to Confederacy demands, but the lower-class Kon'me decided they were invaders and launched a rebellious counter-attack. Even though the Republic sent forces to help the Kon'me against the Confederacy, the Kon'me rebels saw everybody as invaders, and apparently chased all outworlders off.

The Kon'me are rather hulking pinkish lizard guys. I think I'd like to see how they'd be rendered in a style other than that of Genndy Tartakovsky's Clone Wars style, because even as nicely animated as those are, their style is very... stylistic.

Rating: 4/5. It's rather nice to see a native society not just get steamrollered by the bigger polities of the galaxy, even if it's not necessarily realistic. (Note that they aren't a primitive native society, at least not by the average standard.)

583. Koorivar. Apparently, at some point in their history, the Koorivar were known by some other name and lived on their original homeworld, which orbited a dangerously unstable star. They taught themselves to be "corporate-minded," and so were able to make enough money to buy themselves another planet, Kooriva, from which their current name comes.

Their language is soft and whispery and they are adept at reading body language, and supposedly this helps make them business expert types.

The main thing that stands out about their appearance are these rather hilarious huge spiral-shaped horns on their heads. I mean, I look at them and almost can't keep from laughing. It's like those silly robots with drills on their heads. Even by the standards of "well, it's for display," they seem rather implausible. Apparently, these horns affect their social status somehow, as large-horned ones have higher social status (attributed to genetic predisposition to being better at business... right...), and one who had lost his horn seemed to have become a mildly insane outcast (though still a high-ranked individual).

Also, the female Koorivar appear to be identical except perhaps in color (the males I've seen are green, while the one female I've seen is naturally pink), so the lack of obvious differentiation is in their favor in terms of not being incredibly silly.

Rating: 3/5. Some of the stuff about their social status seems to be attempts at revision or disagreement between different writers.

584. Kooroo. The Kooroo are believed to have founded the Fellowship of Kooroo, a religious organization that may have been more than 20,000 years old in the era of the movies. They may have built some shrines as well, though that might have been the Fellowship later on. But the Old Republic never figured out who the Kooroo actually were, that is, they never "discovered" them. It is also possible that Kooroo was a single being. The Fellowship also had some members who were scamming other members.

So, um, it's a mystery.

Rating: 2/5. A mystery with a little bit of potential.

585. Kordans. The Kordans are hulking gorilla-like beings, towering taller than Wookiees even when hunched over. They unfortunately are described in a rather demeaning way on Wookieepedia that seems to ignore the fact that humans are essentially also monkey-stock. Yes, they're simian, guys. So are we.


Anyway, apparently the Kordans were a primitive bunch (in the technological and cultural sense) who were manipulated by a splinter group of Mandalorians called the Death Watch and armed with advanced weapons and tactics in order to help the Death Watch ambush the main group of Mandalorians lead by Jaster Mereel, who was the big leader ("Mandalore") of the Mandalorians at the time, leading to Mereel's death and to Jango Fett taking over as Mandalore.

That's about it.

Rating: 3/5. I think I'm being generous because it gives me the notion that there are a bunch of heavily armed gorilla people out there in the Star Wars galaxy, even if they aren't exactly our idea of what gorillas are.

586. Korfani. One Korfani by the name of Adranax (which is a very cool name) was a poet. His poetry...

"Why mourn for tomorrow in tears today
When current fleeting hours not long shall stay?
Come stroll with me, we shall find your lost peace
In an old friend's arms and a gentle kiss."

...kinda makes me want to puke. ("Peace"/"kiss"? That's an awful rhyme, and I should know because I'm a world-class terribly rhymer.)

Rating: 1/5. I guess I shouldn't be so harsh, but... Sheesh.

587. Kowakian monkey-lizards. Remember that weird little malicious bird/monkey/reptile thing that sat around in Jabba's palace laughing like a Muppet at everything (because technically it was a Muppet) and chewed C-3P0's eye out? He was a Kowakian monkey-lizard named Salacious B. Crumb.

Whether monkey-lizards are actually sapient is a hotly debated subject, but it seems rather likely, as not only was Crumb smart enough to get lots of attention and still survive in a place where such was very dangerous (Jabba's palace, of course), but at least one admittedly mutated monkey-lizard also was a Dark Jedi. (He was paired with another mutated being, Gorc, who was apparently a Gamorrean by birth; they called each other brothers and claimed to be twins. It's actually a teensy bit cute, in a rather twisted way.)

Apparently, they basically live as monkeys, the difference being they lay eggs.

Rating: 3/5. Eh, I don't know.

588. Krakai. The Krakai are freaking awesome-looking monstrous things created by the DarkStryder, the creation of the Kathol that... um... it created.

Unfortunately, Wookieepedia is pretty light on information beyond the awesome picture.

Rating: 4/5. They just look that awesome.

589. Krevaaki. There are exactly three known Krevaaki. Two were Jedi and one was a Sith Lord. Apparently they don't have a lot of other job opportunities for cool-looking tentacled lobster guys that aren't much good at doing things other than holding walking sticks and lightsabers.

In all seriousness, in all the pictures I've ever seen of Krevaaki they either weren't doing anything at all or they were holding lightsabers or walking sticks. It's like they can't even do anything else.

It's also notable that all noted appearances of the Krevaaki come from a minimum of five or six hundred years before the films' era.

Rating: 4/5. They look pretty cool, and if you're going to have old alien Jedi hanging around leaning on walking sticks, they might as well be either unassuming (i.e. Yoda) or cool.

590. Krieks. Krieks are toothy tortoise things. (Note that all modern turtle species lack teeth, which makes the eternal grimaces of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle action figures particularly ironic.) They are attributed as being inhabitants of a planet called Kriekaal, which is said to have seas made of molten duranium and constantly disintegrating and re-forming continents also made of the material, which suggests to me that the people who made this attribution don't have any darned idea what kind of conditions are necessary for life. (Said planet is also mythologically attributed as the death place of some kind of unknown alien named Ssiskor-said legends claimed it was a supernatural event in which the oceans destroyed said alien, but I don't think that oceans made of a molten material which normally requires lightsabers to melt would really require supernatural events to destroy a living being.)

What really matters is that the Krieks are cool tortoise guys. (Well, at least one picture indicates they are, anyway.)

Rating: 3/5. That background stuff is stupid, but I like turtle guys, especially ones who look like they could thrash you with one forelimb and no perceptible effort beyond balancing.

-Signing off.

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